I miss you..

Everything I do, see and hear reminds me of you. I miss your smile, your laugh, the way your eyes sparkle in the light, the way that you freak out with your friends when you talk about your favorite kpop group, or when you poke me and say ‘You’re so fluffy’, I miss everything about you. 

This is the first day that I didn’t have any communication with you since, who knows when! We both said that it was our sacrifice this holy week not to load and text. But, I really miss you right now, I miss texting you good morning, asking how you’re doing or what is your crazy cousin saying about me. I miss talking about random stuff, even though we’ve got nothing else to say. I miss saying “I miss you” over and over again when we say good night. And how you’re not letting me win when I say that I miss you more. 

I want to call you right now just to hear your voice. God, I think I sound so cliche! I guess it’s the effect of missing you. I woke up late this morning. I guess that it’s only because I text you good morning everyday that I wake up at around 7 am. My day only consisted of thinking about you. I spent hours inside the music room, playing ‘Vanilla Twilight’ over and over.

It really is accurate, the line in the song..

When I think of you, I don’t feel so alone.

I kept re-reading your texts and smiling to myself. I’ll see you on Monday, and I just can’t wait. I miss you so much.

I miss you to infinity and beyond! :)

Why so accurate? XD

Ang galing ni SimSimi! :D

My cousin and me. xD While playing Modern Warfare and listening to the teaser of Despicable me 2.
Cousin: My girlfriend memorized that. :)
Me (in my head): Yeah, mine memorized Anna Banana. Hahaha.
Libre mangarap. Hahaha. K? =))

Imba mo lang. Hahaha. x)) Ako: Eh! At least let me walk you home, or mkta ka man lang sumakay ng pedicab! I promise di ko sasapakin yung guy pag nakita ko. Haha! x))
Siya: Wushu. Dumadamoves like Jagger ka lang eh! jk. Mang'asar ba naman? Hahaha.
Ako: Ang adik mo!! Nagaalala lang ako eh! =))

Yung safety mo kasi yung iniintindi ko!

Eh kasi naman ikaw! Ang kulet mo, ayaw mo padin sabihin sa mama mo yung pedicab thing. Pano pag inulit nung guy yun? Please? Sabihin mo na. Nakakatakot eh. >_<

Seryoso ako dun sa sinabe ko, kung di mo sinabe by next week, Ihahated kita sa bahay niyo, kahit man lang mkta kitang makasakay ng pedicab. Nagaalala ako eh. -.- Kahit ilang beses kitang kinulit na sabihin na, di mo padin sinabi!

Ang kulet kulet!!! Hay, naman eh. Di ka mkakatakas sakin sa Monday, ihahated kita. No questions asked. 

:Christel: What an imba question. :)) Okay, so magkatabi kami kanina. Buong half-day. Eh ba't ba? Masakit throat niya eh. So ayun, nag-uusap kami. Kung ano ano pinaguusapan namin. Hanggang uwian. imba lang ni Tel.
Mami Tel: (nilayo ako sa crowd) Okay. I WANT DETAILS.
Ako: Wait what? Ano? Hahaha.
Mami Tel: You know what I mean. (raises eyebrows)
Ako: Oi Grabe! Wala un! Hahaha. :)) Malisyosa!
Mami Tel: Yeah right.
Ako: Di nga!
Mami Tel: K fine. Sabi mo eh.

Broken Angel.

Listen to it, it’s a song, it was covered by Boyce Avenue.

Okay so earlier, we had class, although no teacher went to our classrooms because it was clearance week, so we were sitting together, sharing her mp3 player, we were playing random songs, when this song came on, she stopped changing songs. We listened to it. I had listened to it a few times before, although I didn’t pay attention too much to the lyrics. She had tweeted that this was her life’s song. While we were listening to it, one line caught me. “When you were his daughter” I was caught off guard, so that’s why, she had lost her father before being born. I never really actually thought about that side of her. It turns out, she misses her father dearly, I only realized now. And now as I’m listening to the song, it makes me want to cry. She lost him. I know, that if her father was still here, he’d be very proud of his daughter, his Angel. His Angela. 

I don’t know why this is important, but I just wanted to post it. It really struck me. She doesn’t really talk about her father much.

I won’t give up on us.

We went to her house today, since my parent’s found out, I made up an excuse and told them I was going to another friend’s house. I know that they won’t let me go if they found out it was at her house. We watched movies. We watched her favorite movie, Kill Bill, then we had Black Swan, I managed to excuse myself pretty well to my parents, but I was still nervous, when they called me during black swan, I went out of her room to talk to my mom, my heart was pounding, I guess, I was still guilty in what I was doing, yeah, I want to be with her, yes it’s unfair for them not to let me go, but they’re still my parents, I still love them. My hand was shaking the whole time my mom and I were talking on the phone. After about 3 minutes, I came back into the room, everyone wondered why I was sweating so much, they even kid that I touched myself or something. My hands were still shaking, and I tried my best not to show it to her, my friends who knew, tried and controlled me, I couldn’t breath properly, I went up the bed and sat in the side, with her in front of me, I tried my best to compose myself, by the time the movie finished, I was still shaking. She found out her mother was already on the way home, I asked one of my friends to go down already.

“CJ, baba na tayo, di ako makahinga dito eh” I said, we went down and saw her there fixing the house, I looked at him and mouthed “Tulungan natin siya” so we did help her, afterwards, we went outside and just sat in the middle of the road, after a while, I relaxed, good thing when we were talking outside, I already composed myself. Once she went away for awhile, I talked to my bestfriend.

“Abbie, gusto ko na sabihin sa kanya, ang hirap kasi eh, na di ipakita sakanya na knakabahan na ko kanina, kailangan ko na yung comfort niya, pero ayoko naman siya idamay dito sa sitwasyon ko, di ko alam kung ano gagawin ko!” My bestfriend told me that I shouldn’t tell her, which I think is best too. My mood lifted when we were just chilling outside their house, eating ice cream from the cart that just passed by, we even shared a popsicle. I guess, when she’s there, I forget everything and just be with her. Live life. It’s very hard to lie to my parents, I feel guilty, but I know that it is unfair to me if I did tell them the truth and they won’t let me go, but I just can’t do it. They’re still my parents, I still love them. No matter what, but, I still want to be with her. I’m so confused. But this I’m sure of, I’m not giving up on me and her, no way. I just hope it won’t come to the point when I have to tell her what’s happening. I really hope so.